Your Soul's Voice

A big part of healing from toxic dynamics is accessing your truth and your voice. Talk therapists know this wisdom, as well as those who work within the expressive arts.

So many of us have been silenced by abusers or bullies, or perhaps we were not taught that our perspective, feelings and truth mattered. We are told that we have to nice, kind and complacent, going along with the status quo.

What happens when the status quo doesn’t work for us? What if we are being taken advantage of, used, or abused? Being able to sort out your truth – whether in a journal, talking to a friend or coach, or delving into an art project—can help to move you out of victimhood into claiming your own personal power.

Many people are so afraid of making judgments or not hearing the other person’s side (which is noble and a good attitude to have ultimately), that they lose touch with their own inner voice and intuition. 

I’ve had numerous experiences of workplace bullying, intimate partner power struggles and family gaslighting. The way through those experiences was for me to sit with myself, without making myself wrong about the chaos that was happening, and truly listen to my own voice that is telling me that something just does not feel right, loving, or fair. This takes the situation out of the blaming zone and moves everything into a place of self-validation. In that place, I can then decide what boundary feels right for me to create, as well as what I would feel comfortable addressing or not addressing with the other parties involved.

Imagine validating and reassuring yourself first? Really asking yourself what it is you need to feel better about the circumstances? Then decide to take appropriate, grounded action. Wouldn’t it help save you from a whole bunch of confusion and self-doubt?