One of our fundamental wounds in life is the feeling of
being rejected. Whether that be with our families, our culture, our bodies,
monetary status, not going along with the “rules” of a group or whatever else. We will often do anything to hold onto a
relationship in order not to feel rejected.
But it inevitably happens because it is impossible to be accepted by
everyone, nor should we be.
In fact, rejection can lead us onto a road where we do
belong, if we can come through the hurt and see it that way. It could be the
universe telling us that we are barking up the wrong tree and we need to find a
different tribe of people.
For example, I used to try and fit in so I could pay the
bills by taking office jobs, even though I found them to be boring, petty,
toxic and out of line with my spirit. I
was essentially lying to myself for the sake of material comfort. And it was
killing my joy, inspiration and sense of dignity. When I decided to step out of that seemingly
easy route, and went to take on other pursuits, I discovered a whole heap of
things about myself. I discovered that
I’m a terrible organic farmer, that I don’t like couch surfing, that I need a
feeling of personal sovereignty in my life instead of following other people’s
agendas and goals, that I’m not good at details and banking and bookkeeping,
that I’m sensitive to high drama dynamics and gossip, that I need environments
that are peaceful and calm, etc. So I
had to go through many grueling experiences and changes of where I thought my
ideals were and where I felt happy and safe.
I’ve had people angry with me, disappointed, controlling and forcing me
to be something I wasn’t. Often I walked away either feeling rejected or doing
the rejecting. And there was a lot of pain.
But at the end of the day, I had to live with myself and look at myself in the
mirror. Living from your soul has never
promised to be a comfortable path.
But it was worth the exploration, because the sense of
knowing who I am and who I’m not without
needing other people’s approval, as well as feeling more connected spiritually,
has given me a sense of greater personal power.
I came to know that I’m interested in spirituality, healing,
communication, art, writing, personal freedom, other cultures, being of
service, tourism, earth-friendly practices, self-understanding and
prayer/meditation. I also discovered my
gifts as an intuitive healer, medium and psychic, rather than diminishing them
or holding myself back.
But all of this required experiences of me being rejected, overtly
or subtly, which moved me towards areas in life where I’m seen, embraced,
accepted and understood. As much as
there are people who “get” the psychic/intuitive world, there are also a whole
lot of people who think it’s crazy, wacky, weird and even evil. My greatest armour for these doubters and
criticizers is having my group of people where I am understood and encouraged. Knowing that if I don’t go in the directions
that are in alignment with my truth, I’m going to suffer because I’m living
someone else’s life and betraying my own knowing.
Rejection is the main source of pain in a breakup,
especially for the person who is being left.
It makes one feel unlovable, unworthy, unwanted, inadequate…and the list
goes on. It can be so shattering,
confusing, depressing and isolating, making a person feel powerless. It hits
the core wound in every human being where we feel completely broken or
incapable in the eyes of the divine.
Someone who we’ve shared our bodies, minds and hearts with is now saying
there’s something wrong with us. And it hurts. We can go into self-punishment
or acting out in ways where we pretend we don’t care. We can become defiant or
disheartened, unsure of who we are or what to do next.
This is why I’ve created the Life After Heartbreak: A Woman's Journey to Self-Love, 8-week Group Workshop Series. It is for
people who are going through a relationship breakdown and are struggling to
regain balance, a sense of themselves and forgiveness within their hearts. It can be with any kind of relationship –
friend, spouse/love partner, boss, family member… anyone who we feel has created a distortion
in our self-esteem and we want to get back on our feet with greater inner
strength and confidence. I believe that
there’s no need to wallow for months, or even years, or go into
self-destructive patterns when we can surround ourselves with others who get it
and are recovering in the same way. Life
and time is too precious to waste it on someone who has decided that they want
or need something (or someone) different.
You, quite frankly, have bigger fish to fry and new directions to go
in.
The Workshop Series works through all of the dynamics of a
relationship breakdown, using meditations, activities and sharing with other
women in order to understand yourself, the experience and the next steps towards
moving forward.
It’s on Wednesday
evenings starting October 1st at Natural Choice Well-being Centre in
Fergus. For more info, you can visit: http://blossoming-heart.ticketleap.com/open-your-heart-again-life-after-heartbreak/
If you’re not able to join us then, I will be starting one
on Thursday evenings in Guelph on October 16th. So by the time the holidays roll around, you
will be in a space of greater peace and happiness.
If you’re not much of a groupie type, I also offer
individual programs where we can go deeper together using intuitive and
alternative approaches. Because I
believe no one has to suffer alone and someone needs to be there through your
tears and victories. Learning to love
yourself in these difficult times is the key to getting through this on the
other side. You can book a free initial session so we chat about where you are
and what you need by clicking here.
If you’re not wanting to commit to anything, but need the
initial support of a workbook, you can download my free Open Your Heart Again e-workbook.
I hope you can accept my invitation to join me during this
difficult time on your path, because I know that on the other side of it is
great opportunities for self-love and self-care for you. Because no matter what
anyone has been said or done, you are loveable.
***
Heather Embree is a soul intuitive mentor, reader and
healing practitioner who lives in Guelph, ON.
She has experienced many relationship breakdowns in her life and has
discovered the importance of getting the clarity and wisdom with each
separation so one can walk forward with greater wholeness and peace
within. She’s come to know that
ultimately we are each (and dogs, of course) our greatest healers, and
Heather is simply a guide encouraging you towards your recovery, truth and
happiness.
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