A recent awareness has been coming into my sessions lately.
I'm witnessing that some of our deepest patterns of love and relationships and what keeps us stuck
in the “same old, same old” has to do with the emotional resonance we have with
our circumstances or dynamics.
No matter
how old or young we are, or how many intentions we make about doing something
differently, our hearts and emotions hold memories that remind us of past
experiences.
Many of us want to put the past behind us, just wanting to
move forward. We’re looking for freedom, ease, positivity, hope, love and a
different way of doing things. But somehow we carry the same feelings and
reactions into our present time when a situation arises that reminds us of a
difficulty or challenging relationships.
Then we behave like we are 10 years old all over again and we shut down
or fall into an argument or get a low self-esteem hit. I know this so well…I’ve been there, done that
and continue to have to check myself.
We wonder why we’re back there again. How has this happened? Why won’t it go away? What
do we have to learn? Why can’t we just
let it go?
What I’ve come to learn is that our challenges that keep
repeating are simply emotional resonance. We are feeling a trigger or a point
where it reminds us of when we felt powerless before because we had big and
scary people around us, or we felt hopeless to change our circumstances.
They say we attract similar circumstances in our life until
we learn the lesson. Often times we have
no freakin’ clue what that lesson is and we’re lost in the muck of it.
In order to re-gain personal power over it, I always
encourage clients to check into a time when they had this similar feeling. What
happened? What was that feeling? What did they believe about themselves? What
is a new decision they can make to respond differently, where it’s more
self-honouring and self-respect?
I’ll give you an example. At last night’s Open Your Heart Sharing Circle for Women that I hosted in Guelph, we did a short meditation on
one root of our low self-worth. I
journeyed back to a time when I was around 4 years old. My great grandmother
favoured my sister over me. She used to
give my sister as many coffee crisp candy bars as she wanted and she’d give me
none. She would lock me out of the bedroom and play cards with my sister. In
the meditation I realized that I believed that I did something wrong to deserve
this. So whenever someone doesn’t give
me something I desire or treat me fairly, I believe that I am being deprived
for a reason and I internalize it. The
new decision I made was that I could go to another candy jar – that is, I could
go somewhere else to get my needs and desires met. I don’t have to take cruel
treatment or believe that I’m an undeserving or unlovable person because of
someone else’s choices. This somehow lifted that sobbing, self-pitying inner
child in me to a grown woman now who can make a whole new choice and find my
sugar somewhere else.
It doesn’t mean
that I don’t attract people or circumstances that are like my great
grandmother, who deny me of my rightful pleasures and desires, it’s just that
now I can see it from a new perspective and make another choice instead
whenever I feel deprived or rejected by another simply for being alive.
It is so easy for us to take a whole host of situations
personally – our soul and emotions resonate to that which we know or are
familiar with. This is where energy
healing, emotional healing or soul coaching are great ways to find resolution
and a whole new way of being so you don’t have to experience or attract the
same kind of suffering.
If you would like to explore your options and find ways to
resonate with a different emotional pattern, please consider booking a FREE
Sharing Our Hearts Session to see if soul coaching is right for you, please
visit my site at: www.blossomingheart.ca
With love,
Heather Embree
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